F the EFF

Looks like no one ever learns. In their little press release the EFF uses my name twice. I have a trademark on my name, and therefor I am entitled to damages now 2 fold. What is 2 x infinity? I don’t know, Tara tells me 2 x infinity is the sign of the dinosaur reemergence. I am not so sure. However in the interest of negotiating, I will accept a live TyrannosaurusRex as compensation. I have consulted with my trusted advisor Brett Kimberlin and we have concluded a 4 step response.

  1. Further perjure ourselves to the court to obtain a peace order against Matthew Inman and the EFF.
  2. Subpoena all social media in order to send Cease and Desist orders to all critics of this litigation.
  3. Try to settle with said critics for defamation in the amount of $100,000.
  4. Any settlements will be used to create a new TV network called Carrion News. It will only display my political leanings and vilify all that oppose myself or Brett.

Also to those who oppose me in the comments of these (or any) posts, Tara is already drawing dicks on your avatars.

Charles Carreon Esq.

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4 Comments

  1. Santosh A Halper

     /  June 21, 2012

    You gave me much great advice when I asked earlier, and I wanted to let you know I’m now enrolled in Community College to become a nuisance litigator. I have also redacted all mentions of your name from my personal Twitter account and replaced them with “he who must not be satired” as requested in your letter, along with pay-palling you $100 US Dollars in settlement (as requested in your followup letter re:the letter.) I know you prefer cash, so I am awaiting your followup letter eagerly.

    Regarding College, what is the best subject to Major in if I want to be a nuisance litigator, Ramones fan, midnight cowboy, and professional vicitim?

    • Those are all very good topics of study. I would add to the list only Library Science, thereby you can post anything you want online as an official Library and not be countersued for copyright infringement, defamation, or break attorney client privilege.

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