Did I ever tell you about the time…

I tried to sue the Oregon Bar? It almost happened. Then some Nazi conspirator decided she’d go and shoot me down. Telling me that I am misinterpreting the facts and not knowing my legal apple from the my legal orange. One is orange and one is red, well sometimes pink, or green, or yellow, or… oh never mind.

I bet she’s a friend of Matthew Inman too. It’s all part of an Oatmeal conspiracy that goes even into the past! That’s right Paul Levy, Matthew Inman, Adam Steinbaugh, Nicholas Weaver, Will Ross and Christopher must have figured a way to go into the pass and commit rapeutation! Those evil Illuminati bastards. How the hell did they develop time travel before I was able to clone dinosaurs? Now they can go back in time and retrieve actual dinosaurs… oh my god… the Illuminati could go back in time and stop me from being born! THE ONLY WAY TO SAVE MYSELF IS TO WRAP MY WHOLE BODY IN TIN FOIL!! My god. They all must be sued. Along with the above mention persons, I will sue Does 1-1000, Ann Bransom (who has never produced dinosaurs for me), ArsTechnica, Abraham Lincoln, George Washington, Billy Crystal, Anderson Cooper, and Queen Latifah. This is no longer a fight for the present or the future, but for history itself!

Not Selfish,

Charles Carreon Esq.

prosecution correspondence-p0001 – p0087 <– The full file.

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8 Comments

  1. pathgirl

     /  July 12, 2012

    Why always insist on payment in dinosaurs? The illuminati prefer ponies, fire breathing ponies that fort rainbows and glitter. Have you tried a pony? Has Tara tried a pony (wait don’t answer that I really don’t want to be scared for life)?

  2. KidKarolus

     /  July 12, 2012

    Having read this, it disgusts me to no end that you would post the personal information of a Jon Doe in a public forum. That said, your ‘rapeutation’ website is only serves to mock and and deride you for your continued insanity and unfiltered bullshit.

    Congratulations! You are officially the most public figure of general scorn imaginable. Momma would be proud.

  3. Nicholas Weaver

     /  July 12, 2012

    Actually, charles, you should make it a habit of being paid in laptops you take from your clients, not dinosaurs.

    After all, you yourself said “As a practical matter, it would probably make sense to have me retain the laptop, which has a market value of around $650 US, accoridng to current bids on 700MHz Acer laptops on eBay.com, and the content, which may have a few hundred dollars of retail value, and I will write off the outstanding bill for services.”

  4. Allen C

     /  July 12, 2012

    This all suddenly becomes clear. When Carreon worked for Sweet Entertainment (a Canadian company) he finalized a lawsuit against an American company that has stolen some of Sweet’s media.

    He takes the money and puts it in a trust. He was not supposed to do this, his orders were to deliver it to Sweet Entertainment. Instead he sticks it into a trust. He then withdraws some of the money for personal needs (his condo in Vancouver).

    Suddenly the whole “I want to put Inman’s money in a trust” makes a lot of sense. Scroll down to the telephone memo by Lynn Bey-Roode for sourcing on this. The condo and trust are on page 3.

  5. I’ve been DICKed! So has my wife. People all over the internet are making fun of our postings on psychotic-hippy.com and batshit-crazy-buddha.com. This Distributed Internet Collaborative Kick-down [DICK] is causing my wife, Tarda, and myself great emotional distress. Not to mention these terroristic CIA operatives taking the Carreon name in vain. Will you sue them for us. We want velociraptors. Tarda wants to ride one. I figure why not, she been ridden by most everything else on the planet.

    Charles Carreon IV
    the other other Charles

    • lorien357

       /  July 12, 2012

      So, Mr. TM is actually posting people’s information publicly and seems to be putting pressure on the employers (or at least mentioning them) for all three people he named. I think he might be getting close to wildly tresspassing into dangerous legal territory. Keep up the good work SC. Oh, and he can’t read a tos for crap (photobucket, register.com, indiegogo). Excellent internet skills.

      Wonder how long until he sues photobucket.

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