Get Dave!

This Dave guy is supposedly linked up to the website charlescarrion.com. Now I am not 100% sure, but I am pretty sure he’s the reincarnation or clone of Dave Thomas. It’s gotten to this my dear readers (all but the hackers who comment on my blogs), these Illuminati have now begun a massive cloning program of past fast food historical figures to warp our minds and convince us to eat their hamburger lies. The CIA also controls another smiling fast food icon:

However I can see through his ketchup colored smile right into his Illuminati lies. See how he’s trying to be a Buddhist to throw us off? I wonder what he has on under that mustard colored jumpsuit. Probably a Nazi uniform, that’s what. I should have know McDonald’s is evil. Look into his hollow zombie eyes? Mind control? Yes. Of all things I know to be true, this is the most important fact of all:  You don’t put ketchup and mustard on a hamburger, you put ketchup on a hamburger and mustard on a hotdog. Proof that they’re trying to distort our sense of reality. How long have you been eating their Illuminati deception? I bet you’ve had their mustard flavored kool-aid at some point in your life. This all brings me back to their attempts to deceive the general public, a public I am trying to save by spreading the truth. Remember, if you can’t lick it, it isn’t real, but if it’s a hamburger and when you lick it, it taste like mustard, it probably isn’t real either.

You Won’t Be Lovin’ It,

Charles Carreon Esq.

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10 Comments

  1. Stephen King vs. Charles Carreon

    King is sueing for trademark enfringement for the use of “dear readers” and/or “fellow reader”

    Now that’s two lawsuits against you, sir, including the one with the mysterious John Doe.

    • What is he a king of anyways? NOTHING. He better dismiss his case before I win and seek attorney fees. Or he better have a few Tyrannosaurus Rex laying around.

  2. Allen C

     /  July 17, 2012

    Tara actually seemed to be coming down off her rage high until Oat’s packaged arrived. It provoked a whole new disjointed storm of rambling. My favorite part is after all the Carreon whining and crying about internet hordes being sent to attack them, they don’t bother to censor the addresses on the package.

    I know the address was out there before, but come on… Also they need to work on their yard and pool. The yard looks horrible in both Bing anf Google maps. The pool is an unseemly shade of green in the Bing maps photo.

    • I will be suing Google Maps and Bing Maps to take more flattering pictures of my pool.

      • Elegy

         /  July 17, 2012

        Yeah, you should sue and make them replace the image of your house with Streisand’s house. That’ll show them.

  3. Nicholas Weaver

     /  July 17, 2012

    Hey charles, since Inman’s mailing is intended for your client care of you, shouldn’t you open it? Just saying, because you are like an attorney and all…

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