The controversial billionaire is rumoured to be planning to clone a dinosaur from DNA so he can set it free in a Jurassic Park-style area at his new Palmer Resort in Coolum.
Crocodile Dundee say what? Who does this down under brother think he is? Dinosaurs are my schtick, and mine alone. You can’t go around talking about cloning dinosaurs, I trademarked the whole idea and will now be suing this billionaire into the stone age (pun intended). This guy has a lot of balls thinking he can just ride into the dinocloning business without the years of footwork I’ve put in? Who was drawing crayon pictures of a dinosaur DNA transmonogrammer back in the 70s? THIS GUY RIGHT HERE. So Clive Palmer needs to take his attention mongering else where, because dinosaurs are all mine.
Anyways, how much is a billion Australian dollars worth in US Currency? 50 bucks right? Dude doesn’t have the capital to get this thing started, and even if he does how is he going to handle the Illuminati? I bet he didn’t think that through. We’ll see who’s laughing when Nazi shocktroopers come storming through his doors trying to assassinate him for flaunting his dinosaur plans around. I know it won’t be him, because he’ll be dead. Clive probably doesn’t even know about Wikipedia’s plot to destroy all dinosaur cloners. What a sap.
The One and Only DinoCloner,
Charles Carreon Esq.